How to Raise Concerns About a Child’s Speech and Language Development: Provider Do’s and Don’ts

Noticing a possible delay in a child’s speech or language development can be sensitive,

especially when sharing concerns with families. Yet early identification and support make a significant difference in a child’s communication and overall development. Providers play an important role in observing children, documenting progress, and partnering with families in a way that is respectful, supportive, and culturally aware.

The guidelines below offer practical do’s and don’ts for talking with families about potential communication delays in early childhood settings.

DO’S:

• DO understand typical developmental milestones.

Review age-appropriate speech and language milestones and early warning signs before approaching a family. Development varies widely, but familiarizing yourself with expected skills helps guide conversations and documentation.

• DO remember that development is not identical for all children.

Children progress at different paces, including those learning more than one language. Count words across all languages the child uses. Bilingual or multilingual learning does not cause delays.

• DO approach the topic gently and respectfully.

Start with open-ended questions or observations:

• “I’ve been noticing how his communication is growing—what are you seeing at home?”

• “Have you noticed any new words or sounds lately?” This invites conversation rather than creating discomfort.

• DO share relevant family history if applicable.

If caregivers mention a family history of speech or language concerns, acknowledge the importance of that information, as some communication challenges can run in families.

• DO encourage families to seek professional guidance.

Recommend that parents talk with their child’s primary care provider. If concerns continue, encourage an evaluation from a licensed speech-language pathologist. Early evaluation offers peace of mind and, when needed, access to services during the most important developmental years.

• DO offer clear pathways to resources.

Help connect families with early childhood evaluations and support services:

• Under age 3: Refer families to their state’s Early Intervention program for a free evaluation.

• Age 3 or older: Families can request a speech and language evaluation through their local school district, even if their child is not enrolled there.

• Private services: Families may seek support from certified speech-language pathologists through local clinics or tribal health programs.

• DO be mindful of family values, communication styles, and cultural norms.

Families respond differently to concerns based on traditions, experiences, and beliefs. Approach every conversation with respect, listening first, and honoring the family’s perspective.

DON’TS:

• DON’T compare siblings.

Each child has their own developmental timeline. One sibling’s skills should not be the standard for another.

• DON’T blame or imply wrongdoing.

Parents do not cause speech or language disorders. Avoid language that suggests responsibility or guilt.

• DON’T diagnose or use labels.

Only a trained professional can diagnose a communication disorder. Providers should stick to clear observations:

• “I’ve noticed she uses single words but hasn’t begun combining them yet.”
  

• DON’T assume services are unaffordable.

Many evaluations and supports are free through Early Intervention or public schools. Others may be covered by insurance or offered on a sliding scale.

• DON’T rely on “wait and see.”

Early support leads to stronger communication, social development, and readiness for school. If concerns are present, addressing them early is far more effective than waiting for improvement on its own.